Arthur Gordon in his book, A Touch of Wonder, tells an intriguing true story that wonderfully illustrates the power of encouragement. Since the book is still packed away, I will have to trust my memory and count on your forbearance if I miss a detail or two!
The story: In the early 20th century, a group of gifted male journalism students at at a major midwestern university banded together to improve their journalism skills. Their philosophy was to hone one another to perfection by ruthlessly critiquing one another's work. To that end, they called themselves "The Stranglers." At this same time, a number of equally capable women journalism students also formed a club to improve their literary skills, but they chose encouragement as the basis of their approach, seeking to draw out one another's strengths and critiquing only what was absolutely necessary. The called themselves, for whatever reason, "The Wranglers." Now it came to pass that several years later one their classmates did some research on the successfulness of his fellow students. His findings about the journalism students was stunning. Whereas none of the men in "The Stranglers" ever achieved any real success in the journalism field, several of the women had achieved national notoriety and some even international acknowledgement. Coincidence? Somehow I doubt it!
I love this story and haven't found many that illustrate any better the importance and power of encouragement. Perhaps the sheer power of encouragement is why the Holy Spirit is called "The Encourager," (a plausible translation for "Comforter" or "Advocate") in John's Gospel. Perhaps, too, that's why Spirit-breathed prophecy is described as for the purpose of "strengthening, encouragement and comfort."
But some of what passes for encouragement in our culture today is, in my opinion, not really encouragement. Rather it is more along the lines of “feel good” niceties that the person him/herself often doesn’t believe. “It will all turn out okay,” they say, or perhaps even quote some scripture without real conviction in an attempt to make the other person "feel better." But encouragement, although it may touch the emotions, isn't primarily about feeling better, it's about "living better," living more courageously.
Encouragement then is about supporting another person by giving her/him courage. And courage isn’t a feeling, it’s a decision to do what is wise, good and right, often in the face of feeling afraid. Fear is a feeling, courage is a choice.
So to encourage someone is to give strength to their “chooser” (the heart). Many times it may indeed cause the person to feel better, but that’s not its real purpose. The goal isn’t for the other person just to feel better (feelings are fickle) but to strengthen the core beliefs, values, will, etc. of the other person so that s/he will live courageously and with confidence in God's nature and Word.
Encouragement therefore must be built on truth and given with conviction to be truly effective. This means that when we say something to encourage another person we speak it from a place of deep conviction and assurance. We may indeed point out strengths in the person or point to hopeful things in their situation but we will find our words far more effective if what we say is really true. And because even Scripture can be given without conviction (or even used mindlessly so that crushes rather than strengthens), we will do well to be sure we really believe the passage we are sharing and that we really can see how it will work out in the other person's life (at least to some extent).
But having said all of this, I don't want anyone to be discouraged from being an encourager! It's really not that hard for God to take our hearts and help us to focus on strengths, on truth, rather than feel good words, especially if we keep in mind the real purpose of encouragement (to put courage into the other person). And since God is the God of all encouragement (a better translation of 2 Corinthians 1:3b), and His Spirit is "The Encourager" and lives in us, I think the yielded and tender-hearted person will find amazing opportunities to "speak truth in love" and see the power of encouragement released on the people around them.
Longing to learn to give courage!
Tom, one of Abba's little children
1 comment:
Thank you for your thoughts on encouragement. I think of myself as endowed with the gift of encouragement, but I have never thought of it as giving someone courage! But it makes so much sense!! Plus It helps me understand why it is so difficult to encourage someone in a situation I have never been through, and why I am so effective when sharing from my own life because I am sharing my own convictions...What I personally know to be true. Now I have deeper understanding of this gift, by God's grace I can exercise it more faithfully, more couragiously because I too have been en-couraged:-) God bless you.
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