Saturday, June 8, 2013

The Problem with "Christianese"

     I am surprised that I haven't posted this before. Today I want to write a few thoughts on the reason why we need to avoid using "Christianese" and then share a rather funny story about Christianese that I collected from the Internet years ago (and edited considerably.
     It is a natural tendency for groups of people to create language unique to their group, so the formation of the strange language known as Christianese and its various dialects (Baptist-ese, Pentecostal-ese, Fundamentalist-ese, Toronto Blessing-ese, House Church-ese, etc.) is not unexpected. But we who wish to connect with those Jesus loves would do well to cleanse ourselves of Christianese language as much as possible so that we remove the barriers that it creates. What barriers? I can think of three off the top of my head: 1) lack of clarity (illustrated humorously by the story below), 2) exclusion of others (people feel excluded when the "club members" talk in language only the club members understand), 3) hurtfulness (think what it feels like to a recovering alcoholic to hear the words "drunk" without further explanation! Think what it feels like to be excluded rather than invited in, etc.). I am sure there are more reasons, but maybe these will do. The point is that if we share our Father's heart for people, we will want to remove every obstacle that might hinder their hearing His invitation to transformation and relationship with Him.
     So to help make my point in what I trust is a humorous but forceful way, I offer today the following story about Ed, a Christian with a real "speech problem." Enjoy (and consider what Papa may be saying to you through it, please!)
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 “Have you ever been saved?” a wide-eyed young fellow asked me this question as we walked toward the bus. He handed me a booklet with a picture of hell on the front. 
“Sure,” I responded. “Once when I was nine, I was swimming at Jones' beach on Long Island, and a strong undertow began to drag me out to sea. My uncle heard my call and ?..” 
“No, no, no,” he interrupted. “I mean redeemed. Have you ever been redeemed? You know, reborn? Washed in the blood?” 
“What,” I inquired, “in the world are you talking about?”
“Convicted,” I mean. “Have you ever felt convicted?” “Well, of course not. I've never been in trouble with the law.” 
He looked at me square in the eye and said, “I think you need to be delivered.” 
“Delivered? I was just waiting for the bus home. I think I'll stick to that, but thank you very much.” He looked at me as though I were speaking another language. 
“Can we have lunch together sometime?” he asked. “I work just down the street.” 
“Sure, that'd be fine.” He looked like a harmless fellow to me, but I must admit, he was unusual and quite difficult to understand. That Wednesday, I had lunch with Ed. He was a little late, but he explained he was having a quiet time. 
I said, “Quiet time? What does that mean?” 
“Well, each day before lunch, I get in my prayer closet.” 
I was puzzled. “You pray in a closet? At work?” 
“Oh, no, it's my car.” 
“You have a closet in your car?”
He changed the subject like the first day I met him. Again he left me confused. This Ed is quite a unique fellow, I thought. As we parted that day, Ed gave me a little book that explained how someone could come into relationship with God through Jesus Christ. I read it and understood it well enough to know that this was exactly what I needed. So that night I submitted my life to Jesus, was "born again" like it stated in the booklet. Two days later, I told Ed. 
He was overjoyed. The following week we got together again, and he strongly urged me to find a good body. Now I was surprised at this suggestion, but it sounded good to me! So I took his advice and began to comb the local health clubs for an attractive body. When I met Denise, I knew she was just the one. We began to date and soon, she became a follower of Jesus as well. 
Ed rejoiced and told us it was crucial that we "get planted" so that we could grow together. I said to Denise, “Sometimes this guy's hard to understand.” 
I told Ed I wasn't quite sure what he meant by planted. He responded, “Committed. You know, both of you need to be committed.” 
“Now wait a minute,” I protested, “just because I don't understand what planted means doesn't mean I'm nuts. Anyway, I think to trust in Jesus is probably the most sane thing I've ever done.” 
Well, it was obvious that Ed's patience was growing thin, and he explained, “Bob and Denise, you've got to get plugged in. Don't you understand?” 
Well, no, we didn't. I did wonder if getting plugged in had any connection with going out under the power, something that I'd heard Ed mention and hoped it would never happen to me. 
Regretfully, I had to miss worship the next Sunday out of town. But Ed and I had breakfast together later, and he filled me in on what had happened. He said, “Boy, God moved!” He said, “God really moved yesterday.” 
“Where did He go, Ed? I was just getting to know Him and now He's gone?” 
“No, no, Bob, God hasn't gone anywhere.” I was relieved. “It's just that so many people were stepping out and moving in the gifts.” 
“You mean people were leaving the meeting? And what's this about presents?” 
“No, no. It's the gifts. The gifts were really flowing,” he said. 
Changing the subject, he said, “Hey, Denise was there, and boy, was she on fire!”
“Fire? Denise got burned? What happened? Is she ok?” “
“No, Bob, you don't understand.” 
“And boy, that's an understatement,” I thought. 
He said, “Denise is just fine. It's just that I believe she's really called, and God really wants to use her.” 
Things were not getting any clearer, so I asked, “Did Denise mention she was getting too many phone calls or something? And what's this about God wanting to take advantage of her?” 
Ed sighed, “Can I walk in the light with you, Bob?” 
I said, “Well, yeah, where do you want to go. We can walk in the light. It's daytime, Ed.” 
He just shook his head. I don't know what it is. Sometimes it seems like Ed and I have a hard time communicating.
It's been 2 years since I was saved and delivered, plugged in, planted and committed to a good body. God has been moving, and I've been stepping out in the gifts. I can hardly believe how God's been using me. I do have one new problem, however. It seems that all my friends can't understand me any more. When I share about my redemption, and say that I've been washed as white as snow in the blood, and that I desire to follow the Lamb, they just tune me right out. I guess they're just convicted when they see me on fire.
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Praying you get the point :-)

Tom, one of Abba's little children

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